Dealing with disappointment: 3 lessons for Christians from the Olympics

Some of the most striking moments of the Paris 2024 Olympics so far are not of glorious victory but, instead, of what some might see as ‘failure’.

Adam Peaty narrowly missing out on gold. Simone Biles falling off the beam. Josh Kerr agonisingly losing out in the 1500m. 

But for all of these athletes, what has been amazing is their ability, at least in public, to articulate their deep pride in their performance and a satisfaction - despite things not going quite to plan - in the outcome. 

Adam Peaty is the most successful British swimmer of all time. But the breaststroke king considered retiring last year after what he described as a breakdown. He’s spoken publicly about his battles with alcoholism and depression, and how his new-found faith has helped him.

Speaking to journalists after the race he said: “These are happy tears. I’m not crying because I’ve come second, I’m crying because it took so much to get here. I’m a very religious man, and I asked God to show my heart, and this is my heart. I couldn’t have done more.”

Simone Biles, the most decorated gymnast in history, was another on a comeback journey. After withdrawing from the Tokyo Olympics in 2020 due to suffering from the ‘twisties’, she faced criticism on social media and has spoken openly about the pressure of living in the public eye. Returning to competition in Paris, she has won three gold medals and a silver. Despite the victories, that silver medal, alongside a 5th place finish on the beam - her favoured event - was a shock.

But Biles, who has also spoken openly about her Christian faith, was not perturbed. “I can’t be mad at my performances. A couple years ago, I didn’t think I’d be back here at an Olympic Games. So competing and then walking away with four medals, I’m not mad about it. I’m pretty proud of myself”, she told journalists.

Both Biles and Peaty are incredibly successful. Yet their desire to succeed has not overshadowed their ability to find joy, satisfaction and purpose in the moments when they might have hoped for just a little more.

With 97 per cent of athletes coming away from the Olympic Games without a medal, you could say that the competition teaches us more about how to handle failure than success. I think this can be a good thing. A God-given gift.

So is there a way we can win even when we lose?

Here’s three lessons that apply to us all: 

1. Let loss remind you who you are

Sportspeople can quickly fall into the trap of defining themselves by their gifting or athletic ability. For Olympians, it can feel like a very valid question to ask. In the men’s 100m final, there was 0.03 of a second between first and fourth place. Between guaranteed sponsorships and funding and potentially nothing. Between being known as an Olympic champion and no one remembering your name.

We’ve heard more athletes this summer talk about how the process matters more than the result. Sports psychology in recent years has focussed on this; reminding athletes that they can only control what they can control, and that they are more than their sporting performance. Josh Kerr, for example, was able to process his defeat by remembering that he ran a personal best. 

God does not love the gold medallist more than the one who claims silver. This is where the gospel is truly good news. We find our identity not in anything we do but in what Christ has done for us. In our daily failures, we can throw ourselves on Christ’s ultimate victory and the gift of a new, secure identity as his child. 

1 John 3:1 says: “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!”

Sportspeople especially can be in danger of imagining God as a coach rather than a father, rewarding them according to their performance. This is more like karma than grace, and we can all fall into this trap. Instead, we need to see him as scripture reveals him, loving us unconditionally and delighting in us as we live in relationship with him.

2. In your pain, ask God what he is doing with it

Knowing this truth won’t necessarily take away the initial sting of defeat, but it will help reframe the experience.

As elite sports chaplain, Ashley Null, says: “In the Christian life, God takes each one of his children on journeys they do not wish to go. He makes them travel by roads they do not wish to use. All so he can bring them to places they never wish to leave. With Jesus, pain, no matter how great - even when of Olympic-size proportions - never has the last word.”

Christians can be assured that God is working “for the good of those who love him…to be conformed to the image of his Son.” (Romans 8:28). In our pain he calls us back to himself and promises to make us more like Jesus. It’s uncomfortable to hear, but it is often through adversity that the Spirit cultivates our character the most.

Adam Peaty, who has spoken of his new-found faith in Christ has acknowledged this saying: “Everything I’ve done to this point has happened for a reason. I said to myself I’d give my absolute best, and I have! That’s the victory for me.”

3. Embrace the journey

A focus on embracing the journey mirrors Paul’s description of the Christian life in Philippians 1:6: “And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion on the day of Jesus Christ.” We recognise that (unlike in the Olympics) the result is secure, and our ongoing growth and maturity is a process. 

And what about the athlete who doesn’t trust in Jesus? Is God doing anything in those moments? 

Well, the crushing disappointment of loss may be one way that God points them towards the fact that we were made for something more. Peaty has said: “As athletes, we expect a gold medal to fix all our problems…When you realise it doesn’t, it can be the coldest thing because you’ve sacrificed so much.”

Victory is fleeting, even at the highest level, and cannot truly fulfil us. This life, including the Olympics, is not meant to fully satisfy us but to point us towards the lasting joy and pleasure that can be found in God’s presence alone.

Failure is a gift. Let’s embrace it and learn how to lose well in whatever race we’re running.